Pre-Surgery

I went in for pre-op review on Wednesday. It was a blood test and a chest x-ray.

The hospital world in its ever-impressive sensitivity had a questionnaire about a living will. I realize it was general to all surgeries but could we have talked about this earlier, later or how about never? I am compiling a quickly-growing last of bizarre elements at the hospital during various procedures, waiting, etc. I also have a list of bizarre comments said to me that were less than helpful to say the least. I'd post it here but it's probably only entertaining to me so I'll spare you. For now!

My surgery remains scheduled for Thursday. I want it over but now that it's near, it is a bit scarier. Procedure-wise, it'll be less than some of the testing I've been through they say.

After that, in a few weeks, I'll find out what's next. It's likely to be chemo. Scary but it's a safety, preventative kind of thing. Whatever.

I do believe that I'm in for a battle. It's a battle that I don't have very much control over so that is the truly scary part. If love, laughter and will help, then I'm good. I didn't think I'd get to a place to laugh at macabre things but I'm getting there.

I have very long stretches of time now where I don't think of this. When I do think of it, it doesn't usually bring me to a screeching hault as it once did. It might again, but for now, I'm moving and letting the dumb stuff in life bug me again.

Just as I have a list of bizarre comments that were not well-received, I also have a bigger list of out-of-the-blue kind words and acts. It's a much bigger list. That is the list that makes me cry. The good cry.

I will post again after surgery. In the mean time, my house is a mess, Isaac and Toby are fighting about a railroad track, I brought very important paperwork home with no time to do it and oh yeah...it's all good.

More probably on Friday.

Ruth